I am an old fashioned girl all the way! I own an array of vintage dresses, and I have a love for everything retro. However, I also have what is sadly considered “old fashioned” standards on relationships. I am all for strong independence in women, but in this age of feminism, many gentlemanly behaviors have been lost. Something which I’ve heard feminists say lately is that they prefer that a man does not hold the door open for them because they can do it themselves. Well duh, of course you can open the door yourself. The reason men hold open doors for females is because they wish to treat us women as the special ladies that we are. Without further ado, let’s hop into a list of the chivalrous acts, dating standards, and lady like behaviors which have been lost by many in this generation. Of course some people still follow these, but it is rare to find.
- Women dressing in ladylike attire- I believe that women should dress femininely and modestly. Nowadays the shorts females wear continue to get shorter, and their tops are plunging further down into their chests. There used to be higher standards for clothing, and women held their bodies as sacred. Their bodies were covered, and their intimate parts were only revealed in the bedroom with their husbands. In this feministic age women are being told that showing off their body is a sign of true confidence. I don’t need to strip in order to revel in my confidence. I feel wonderful strutting around in high heels and a modest vintage dress. Women should take pride in their beautifully made feminine bodies, but that does not need to be flung out wherever they go. If you want to be treated lovingly by a man, then dress like the precious woman that you are.
- Solid communication in person. Communication in relationships shouldn’t only be done over texting. There must also be communication done in person or through talking on the phone. When the sole communication in a relationship is done through hiding behind a screen and typing for hours, you are not building a true connection. People are not able to portray their emotions exactly the way they want to through typing, and in general people tend to talk differently over text. Besides, if you never spend time together then how do you know if that person is the one who was made for you? Texting is great, but there also has to be time in person, or else the relationship will never grow.
- Women allowing men to hold doors open for them and pull out chairs for them. Men should be treating women as treasured daughters of the King which they are through gentlemanly acts. Women also need to accept these acts. As a woman who believes in caring for myself and not needing a man to protect me, I still understand the importance of allowing someone to treat me as the lady I am. The man is not doing this because he thinks that you are incapable; he wants to make you feel special.
- The sacredness of sex. Sex should be reserved for marriage and marriage only. I know that you’ve probably heard this over and over, but it is crucial to remember. Sex used to be known as an intimate sign of love through marriage. God created it not to be abused but to be treasured. Sex is the common talk in songs, movies, books; it seems like everyone is doing it now. That doesn’t make it right. If you save it until marriage, the experience will spark a special connection as you pour all of your love into one person. Enough said. Let’s move on now.
- The growing of relationships with marriage in mind. Many people nowadays date for the sake of dating. They don’t see any future with the person they are dating, but they hope to have some fun and fit in with the crowd. They “love” each other but don’t have any thoughts about what their future holds or if there will even be a future. Old fashioned relationships were most commonly done in hopes of building a future with someone. Please don’t simply date someone because you want to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. That will only result in heartache.
- Gradual relationships. Our culture pushes for people in relationships to immediately jump rapidly through a relationship. Some even end up kissing and having sex on their first date. Relationships should be slow and should include time to get to know each other. How can you be intimate with someone that you don’t even truly know? Old fashioned relationships worked gradually and would focus heavily on the developing of a connection.
- The involving of family in relationships. Back then, the opinions of one’s family was important when it came to relationships, but often the wisdom of loved ones is ignored in this era. Without a doubt someday when I have a relationship of my own, my family will be thoroughly involved. It’s basically a two package deal; you want me; you get my family too. My family knows me best other than God, and they also have a deep relationship with God who loves me the most. Please honor your family’s opinion of your lover; there may be something you’re missing. Also allowing your family to go with you and your significant other on outings will build the relationship between him/her and your family.
These are only a few of the things which we sadly lack in society nowadays when it comes to relationships. I hope that this post has thoroughly inspired you to go and be an old fashioned lover yourself. Be different. Stand out. Don’t settle for less then you deserve and have a Godly relationship. Thank you for reading and I will see you all again next Friday. See you soon! *Blows air kisses*
Signed with God’s love,